My year of Filanthropy Friday increased (exponentially) my thankfulness for my life with Buttin - our family and friends and our healthy child.
Buttin and I had an extremely busy year and a really crazy December, but it was very important to Buttin that we "adopt" a family for the holidays.
We found a family of three (mom and two daughters) through Foundation Communities and delivered gifts to them on Tuesday.
When I first spoke with the mother a couple weeks ago she started crying on the phone because she didn't know if her family would receive assistance for the holidays. Her gift requests were humbling - food and cleaning supplies for her, socks, underwear and cowboy boots for her 6-year-old daughter and gift cards for her teenage daughter. We found them all some pretty fun presents.
On Tuesday we met the mom and we showed her the gifts we purchased for her daughters. She was extremely grateful.
Christmas has always been extremely important to Buttin, me and our families. I love knowing we were able to make another family's Christmas a little better this year.
Oh my god. This might be the worst Filanthropy Friday charity you have ever picked. You say that you and "Buttin" or "Hook and Eye", as I prefer to call him, want to adopt a family. Really? I never heard that before or I would have put in my application. I could use some new socks and cleaning supplies and you already know me.
ReplyDeleteWhy adopt perfect strangers who may or may not be criminals when you can adopt a 100% certified (by gypsies) non-criminal like me? At least if you adopt me and my husband (not my extended family - you aren't ready for that kind of crazy) you would know what you are getting. With this new family you have no idea what is going to happen next. Here are a few possible scenarios that I envision:
1. They will call you for bail money at 3 am.
2. They will call you some afternoon and expect you to come clean their house with the cleaning supplies you bought them.
3. They will call you to borrow money.
4. They will drop their kids off for free babysitting when you least expect it.
5. They will return the gifts you so carefully selected with a list of grievances they have about each one.
Don't come crying to me if any or all of these things happen.
I have repeatedly encouraged you to donate to LizWorld™ and you have rebuffed my amazing charity at every turn which is mystifying. If you had asked to adopt me and Jonathan and/or donate to LizWorld™ I would have given you the following wish list which is way better than the one the family you chose to adopt gave you:
1. A pony (black)
2. $1,000 gift card to Neiman Marcus
3. 2 round trip first class plane tickets to NY and 1 week in the penthouse suite at the Pierre Hotel. Plus $2,000 for shopping and incidentals.
4. A longhorn (preferably Bevo but any will do)
5. A peregrine falcon which has been trained to hunt and kill at rats, mice, and other vermin in our yard and neighborhood.
6. Front row tickets to see AC/DC next time they come to Austin. Plus VIP back stage passes.
7. A lifetime supply of Tito's vodka.
8. A Gulfstream V airplane, a pilot, 2 years supply of gasoline for the plan.
9. Elizabeth Taylor's 33 carat diamond which was just auctioned off and would have been a perfect surprise for me this year if you were a better friend.
10. A private island, 200 foot yacht, and a 5,000 square foot custom designed home in the British Virgin Islands. Prefer a custom kitchen with Viking and Sub Zero appliances. Would also like several parrots to live on the island. No mosquitoes or sand flies please.
Signed,
Your very disappointed friend,
Liz, CEO of LizWorld™
PS: Merry Christmas
PPS: It was nice of you to give perfect strangers some presents but, really, if you have that kind of money to toss around you should give it to me...I would use it very wisely.
PPPS: In order to one-up you I am going to buy an entire rainforest and give all the animals their own homes and all the food they can eat. So there.