I've kind of been at my wits end with my tingly feet (aka, maybe Guillain-Barre).
So yesterday, I decided to try acupuncture. My chiropractor (who is also a nurse practitioner) also does acupuncture. He said more of his patients have experienced relief from acupuncture than anything else he's done. I'm hopeful, but honestly at this point if someone told me standing on my head and reciting the alphabet would help - I'd do it (and my friend Liz would be there recording it).
Here's my leg with needles in it.
As a side note, I hate needles so even my trying it should prove my desperation. Honestly, I didn't even feel most of the needles, but a couple of them hit some sensitive areas in my knee and ankle and I was not a fan of those. No relief yet, but I figure I need to give it a few treatments.
Cubbie finally seems to be returning to his normal self. The past three nights have been somewhat difficult - he's been sleeping (or rolling around) in our bed for a few hours and Buttin and I don't get much sleep. Tonight, for the first time in four nights, he had a bath that lasted 30 seconds and did not involve tears. I'm hopeful we'll all get some sleep tonight.
Here's Cubbie playing at the bounce house this afternoon, he's pointing at a chicken!
Note: blogger won't let me post my full comment because it was too long so I have cut this into two comments. This is the first one.
ReplyDeleteDid the acupuncture work? How many times do you have to do it before it works?
If it doesn't work I have a few tried and true methods that you can try. You have insisted on using "traditional medicine" and "real doctors" thus far so I didn't want to bring up the fact that The Society of Tingly Disorders (TSTD) has done numerous studies and experiments to find the most effective remedies for tingling extremities. A few of the tried and true remedies include:
1. Boiling black beans, lima beans, and rare guano beans, draining them, and then drinking the water in which they boiled. Repeat 10 times and you will be cured. Possibly.
2. Contact Dr. Gregory House for a brain drilling procedure. A lot of people think that stuff that happens on TV isn't real or doesn't really work but brain drilling is an effective method for eliminating tingling. Side effects include: coma, catatonic state, removal of personality, and the inability to form sentences. Totally worth it though if your feet quit tingling.
3. Stand on your head and recite the alphabet backward while a friend squirts you with a garden hose turned on to "full blast". Its very important that this remedy be performed in your front yard on a Saturday afternoon between 1 and 3pm in the summertime. It is also very important that someone you trust (like me for example) videotape the procedure to submit to the archives at The Society of Tingly Disorders. For research purposes of course.
4. Go into the woods and find some bear poo. Roll around in it. Do not bathe for 3 days. You will be cured. Or ostracized from society...results of this experimental remedy have been pretty mixed to be honest. I wouldn't start with this one...try one of the others first....especially if the bear is still hanging around when you roll in the poo.
5. Go to McDonalds and buy a large coffee. Ask for the coffee to be extra hot. You don't need to add Splenda by the way. Put the styrofoam cup in between your legs while you drive as fast as you can down 183 during rush hour. Slam on the brakes when you hit the inevitable traffic jam. Coffee will splash all over your upper body and legs which will give you 3rd degree burns for which you will be hospitalized. The burns will suck but you won't even notice tingly feet while focusing on your long and painful recovery. By the time the doctors are finished with all of the skin grafts the tingling will be gone for good.
6. Fly to Pamplona, Spain. Join the "Running With the Bulls" annual race/suicide mission. If you manage to avoid being gored by any of the bulls you will realize that when your life is on the line you can run "hella fast" and you will ignore the tingling for the rest of your life. Even if you don't avoid the bulls your problem will be solved (although this option isn't really optimal if you like "life" and "living" and "breathing) - you should probably go ahead and get your will together before you fly to Spain for this event. Of course I expect to be your primary beneficiary (mostly I want your chest of magic beans that I know you hid in the greenbelt by your house).
ReplyDelete7. Drive down to the US/Mexico boarder and ask a few of the "nice people" wandering around if they have any meth to sell. Then show them your fake Police badge and see where things go from there. I think the chances are pretty good that tingly feet will be the least of your problems if you choose this option.
8. Fly to Austria and check yourself into "The Institute of Tingly Disorders". Stay for 6 weeks. I can't tell you about all of the procedures they will perform because many are proprietary but lets just say you will walk away cured. They have a 100% success rate but many of their former patients are later diagnosed with PTSD, ADD, OCD, and VD but that is probably just a coincidence. What? Those lawsuits were bogus!!!!
9. Go to Liz's house. Scrub her floors on your hands and knees. Then do the dishes. Sweep the floor and make sure to get all that dog and cat hair cleaned up you slacker. Change the sheets, vacuum, feed the dogs, and pour Liz a drink. You will be cured. Shit, you will probably see right through this one, I mean its not a "tried and true" or "FDA approved" cure but I am sure it will work. Sure will make me feel better...of that I am sure.
10. The 10th option is so highly secret that i can't write about it on the internet. We need to set up a super secret meeting to discuss it. Bring $100,000 in small unmarked bills in 2 large duffel bags. Why? Don't ask me why, just do it! Do you want to be cured or do you want to "save for retirement" and "remain financially solvent". Get your priorities straight.
Sincerely,
Dr. Liz (You can just call me Empress if you want)
I hope the acupuncture helps! I've been thinking of trying it for my stubborn hip.
ReplyDelete