Waiting and Waiting

Dear RWL Reader,

I'm quite sure that my posts for the next few days (until Lumpy arrives) will be quite boring. They'll probably be some variation on the same topic - LUMPY COME OUT! It's kind of strange how two weeks ago I was fine with Lumpy taking his/her sweet time - well that time is over and I'm ready to meet Lumpy.

I'm going to take my mother's advice and go get a hair cut today. Maybe Lumpy is embarrassed by my shaggy appearance. I got my nails done last Tuesday, my brows done last Friday so I guess getting my hair done today will complete the package (well as complete as I'm gonna get).

Stay tuned,
Steph

Happy Easter & Lumpy Due Date

Happy Easter!

Today, is the day, predicted by medical science to be Lumpy's birthday. I have a feeling science might be wrong-o on this one.

Here's me and Lumpy on Easter morning, looking not so bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, but we're in a picture.

I've actually been nesting like crazy this weekend. I haven't taken many naps and I've organized a bunch of bathroom cabinets that I swear have not been cleaned out in at least four years. Buttin feels a little guilty as I waddle from one room to another, but I told him to take advantage of this time because chances are - as soon as Lumpy gets here - I won't be cleaning anything.

I have a theory - I think Lumpy is enjoying this time inside my tummy because I'm feeding him/her all sorts of yummy stuff (you'd stay too if all you ate was Cadbury Eggs and fried cheese). I tried to eat a ton of wasabi last night, thinking it might provoke Lumpy to come out - no luck. Today, I might try vegetables. Maybe if I eat a lot of vegetables, Lumpy will think, What the heck is this crap? I'm getting out of here and finding some cupcakes.

That's my theory.

Thirty Second Movie Review - Greenberg

Greenberg

Somewhat cute (albeit a little too quirky) little comedy about aging, friendships and romance. I enjoyed it, but I must admit I'm getting a little tired of the messy-haired, trying to be deep, genre (Buttin says the correct term is mumblecore).

The Mystery Of The Missing Front Door Mat

A while back, Peenie had an accident on our front door area. So, we had to purchase a new front door mat. We bought a nice, easy-to-clean mat from Target:

Not super cute, but it's practical.

Yesterday morning when I left for work, our front door mat was present. However, sometime between 7:30 AM - 9:30 AM (when Buttin left the house to workout - he took the day off yesterday) our front door mat disappeared. The kind of creepy thing, our key was just laying on the ground (yeah, I know very obvious place to leave an extra front door key) undisturbed.

So the mystery is . . . where in the world did our front door mat go? It's not like it a was a cute collector's edition front door mat (because those exist). We live in a cul-de-sac so we don't have much traffic. Who took it? Did a large animal run off with it? A full investigation much be launched, but I'm too lazy to do anything immediately - so right now I just have a few theories.

Missing Front Door Mat Theories:

• Early morning scavenger hunt - maybe there was a high school band scavenger hunt and one of the things they had to collect was a front door mat.
• Someone selling something had an accident - maybe someone came to our door selling magazines or cookies or bird feeders had an explosive poo on our front door mat and because they were so embarrassed, they took the mat with them.
• A joke - we're not really close with any of our neighbors, but maybe this is some kind of practical joke.
  
• A animal took it away - the only animal we really have who hangs out on our front porch (which is really just a collection of collapsing bricks) is Peenie. Peenie doesn't seem strong enough to drag away the mat, but who knows.
• Strange induction method - maybe there's some weird old wives' tale about how if you remove someone's front door mat, the baby comes. Doesn't sound much stranger than some of the other methods, but it still doesn't explain who did it.

Feel free to speculate.

I think this should be the subject of Harlan Coben's next book.

Thirty Second Movie Review - Clash Of The Titans

Clash Of The Titans

Yeah. This movie was pretty horrible and sadly, not even in a fun way. The dialogue was beyond laughable and special effects weren't even OK. The worst thing you can say about a fantasy/action movie is that it's boring and this movie was so boring my friend Liz got out her phone and started playing solitaire.

Fetus Friday - Week 40

OK Lumpy, your birthday is supposed to be sometime this week - so get here so we can all eat some cookie cake.

Baby Center really has nothing interesting to say about Lumpy or about me this week. We're pretty much just playing the waiting game - which for me consists of lots of walking.

Baby Center did mention that Bio Physical Profiles and Non-Stress Tests (two things I had done yesterday) are very common for this stage of pregnancy.

Everyone think positive - COME OUT LUMPY- thoughts this weekend.

Doctor Appointment Update

HAPPY LUMPY BIRTHDAY MONTH - NO MATTER WHAT, LUMPY WILL BE BORN IN THIS MONTH!!!

Here is my update in bullet point form:

• My doula joined me for this appointment, so it was nice for her to get to meet Dr. Elephant.
• Blood pressure - good at 106/72.
• I lost 7 lbs! I keep telling Dr. Elephant his scale is messed up (if you'll remember I gained 3 lbs in the previous week) because I don't really do anything THAT differently from week to week. He was a little concerned with a 7 lb weight loss but I tried to tell him that maybe I just pooped an extra amount this morning - he looked at me like I was nuts.
• When I laid back for him to measure my fundal height he felt my stomach and said, "You're having a contraction. Can you feel it?" Me, "Nope, but if you say so." I think it was a minor Braxton-Hicks contraction (which I have started to feel more frequently), but when I'm laying completely flat on my back - it's hard to feel them. My fundal height is still 31 cm.
• I have dilated a whole 2 cm!! I guess that's progress based upon last week's 0 cm. I'm 20% there!!
  
• Lumpy's heart rate was steady and good - 145 bmp.
  
• He said that if Lumpy didn't have his/her birthday by our next appointment (April 8th) that we would need to schedule Lumpy's induction.
• I'm apparently at the point of pregnancy where I have a non-stress test (hook me up to monitors and measure Lumpy's heart rate for 30 minutes) and a biophysical profile (ultrasound) at every appointment. I did both these test and Lumpy looked great - lots of fluid and lots of movement. I got to see Lumpy practice breathing and Lumpy has hair!!! I also got a cute little picture of Lumpy's face. It's so much fun to think that I'm going to meet this little face in a week or so. I can't tell if it's a boy face or a girl face.
  
• Dr. Elephant was trying to convince Lumpy that Saturday would be a good day to be born, but I'm really thinking next Wednesday (the 7th).

So now, we just wait and try to encourage Lumpy to come out! Barbie and Tubby-Tub brought me spicy shrimp for lunch today. Barbie swore it would only take ONE SHRIMP, but I ate ten for good measure. I guess we'll see . . .