Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Parenting Fail #521

What does it say about my parenting skills that when I give Cub a book, he tries to eat it BUT when handed a remote - this is what he does:


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2 comments:

  1. LizMarch 1, 2011 at 7:32 PM

    I don't see any problem with a 10 month old child using a remote control. He clearly understands cause and effect - when he pushes the buttons the pretty pictures change. In other words he is just like his mom but he is a faster learner (by about 30 years). Not only that but you probably dipped the book in chocolate so no wonder he wanted to eat it.

    No, the problem with the picture above is what isn't in it. I mean who thinks that children watching a lot of TV is a problem? - what are you Amish now? Here is what is lacking from your video:

    1. Charlie Sheen, visionary, diplomat, actor, cocaine enthusiast, and all around great role model for children.
    (Charlie on his children reading about his exploits: “Talk about an education. That’s the guy, and he’s our dad, and we can get all the answers and the truth? Wow, winning. That’s how you perceive it.”)

    2. Fire breathing fists

    3. Porn stars (see #1)

    4. Tiger blood and Adonis DNA. What will Cash grow up to be without it? (One word: Loser)


    "I'm tired of pretending like I'm not special. I’m tired of pretending like I’m not bitching, a total fricking rock star from Mars, and people can’t figure me out; they can’t process me. I don’t expect them to. You can’t process me with a normal brain. I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path, because it was written nice. It was written for normal people, people that aren’t special. People that don’t have tiger blood, you know, Adonis DNA.” - Cash Naylor in 5 years

    The following shows/movies should be required viewing for Cash so he learns to be a freaking rockstar and to be better than all the "little people".

    1. 20/20 interview with Charlie Sheen tonight at 9pm on ABC. Charlie will share more of his wisdom and sage advice. Free!

    2. Celebrity Apprentice. Starts next week and features Gary Busey, Meatloaf, and one of the Jackson sisters - the one with the messed up face.

    3. Lindsay Lohan's trial for jewel theft.

    4. Intervention (Matt's got that covered)

    5. Celebrity Rehab

    6. Cops

    7. Roadhouse (movie - watch repeatedly)

    8. Dukes of Hazard reruns

    9. Keeping Up With the Kardhashians

    10. That show about people who eat weird shit like rocks and soap.

    As usual you are failing your son and you just don't get it. How is he supposed to grow up to be cool if he doesn't have the right role models? Once again its left to me and Hollywood D-list celebrities to save you from yourself.

    Sincerely,

    Your freaking cool bitching rockstar genius friend with Wonder Woman DNA, shark blood flowing through her veins, and a computer (a Tandy - cant afford an upgrade yet) for a brain.

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  2. JenMarch 3, 2011 at 12:53 PM

    "Parenting Fail #521"?? You actually keep track of the numbers? I'm not sure that the numbering system could keep track of all my fails as a parent. You're braver than I am. :)

    Jen

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