Bad Interweb, Bad . . . Bad

**Warning, may contain parts too sad for some readers**

OK - I'll try to make this quick. I've previously written about the Baby Center message boards that I frequently visit for advice and some entertainment (these ladies can get bitchy - meow, makes Psycho Stephanie look downright angelic).

As you might imagine some of the stories other women tell are very sad. In the beginning there were many miscarriages, then many stories of micro-preemies who did not survive, but yesterday in my office I found myself balling.

Michelle's story is such a sad one. She wrote one post back in late November that detailed her situation and it's had well over 2,000 comments. Basic story, she had a baby about a year ago (a little girl, Lucy) who died at 6 weeks of SIDS. After learning she was pregnant in July (of 09) she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Her doctors recommended (because of her need for aggressive treatment) that she have her baby on December 28th (at 25 weeks). On December 28th baby Harrison was born. Oh, did I mention that she also has two adopted daughters?

So, on this one long post - Michelle and her husband (Jeff) would periodically post updates on both Michelle and Harrison's progress. Two days ago, this was the update from Jeff:

**You don't have to read this part if you don't want to be sad, bottom line - Michelle dies**

Michelle passed away peacefully in her sleep on Monday evening. She was able to see Harrison after her biopsy, but she said she felt tired, so it was a very short visit. I stayed a little while longer with him, and when I came back up to Michelle's room, she was asleep. I crawled into bed with her and held her, and she passed away a few hours later. The cause of death is as yet unknown.

We have lots of my family swooping in to help and Michelle's family coming in the days to come. I'm scared for Hailey and Madeline. Some of you may have known that we adopted Hailey and Madeline. They have already lost one mother, and it's horrible that they had to lose another. They're afraid I am going to send them away, which I would never, ever do.

I'm using this board as a sounding board for myself, which is maybe not the right thing to do. Michelle loved you all, even if she rarely posted on the board after her diagnosis, whenever I'd come see her she was always reading. She knew your names and your due dates, she even knew what most of you were having and what you were going to name them. Your support of her on this thread, to me, was absolutely incredible, and although I don't feel like I owe you this update, I feel like I know you'll offer implicit support, and like you won't expect me to act in a way that you want me to.

She was brave and strong and incredible, the sweetest woman you could have ever wanted to know. She never had strong words for anyone. I am taking comfort in knowing that she and Lucy are together now. She didn't speak of our daughter much, but I know she missed her more than I could ever say, and I know that it changed her and affected her very strongly. I miss my girls, but there's a comfort in knowing they're together, and that now I have to focus my energy on my other girls, my girls who now more than ever need a good, stable dad, and my son, who still has a long fight to fight.

Thank you for your prayers. I may update you more infrequently now but I will still update you on Harrison and his progress.

jeff

Two days ago (while reading this), I was a mess in my office. This was the most heart-wrenching thing I had ever read. I thought about it all night long - I think I even told Buttin a few extra times how much I love him because I was just feeling SO THANKFUL for our health and for Lumpy's health.

Well last night (it's very early morning right now - feeling VERY wide awake) I started looking at the message boards (and had already told myself I would stay away from the December 28 post). I started reading other posts about breastfeeding, weird cramping and random off topic things when I ran across a post that essentially laid out in detail how Michelle and Jeff were BIG HUGE FAKERS (I know my friend Liz and my mom probably saw this coming from miles away).

Apparently, there are other women on the Baby Center message boards that have nothing else to do but internet detective work. They found pictures of Michelle and Jeff's baby, Lucy (the one that supposedly died of SIDS), wearing a hospital bracelet with a boys name on it. They pointed out inconsistencies in other posts and in other pictures. It was some crazy CSI kind of stuff. Their theory is that "Jeff and Michelle" were praying on the sympathies of sweet, wonderful and good-natured pregnant women (pretty much the definition of me, doncha think?) and looking for money.

Like many of the other women who frequent the messages boards, I felt relief that the story was not true, but angry that someone would take the time to construct such an awful story. I felt like a gullible doofus that I fell for this story (but I didn't really have reason to doubt it and I certainly didn't have time to research it) I've said it before and I'll say it again, the interweb can be a bad, bad place - especially for me while pregnant.