My Other Desk Calendar

I always talk about my "Don't Sweat The Small Stuff" desk calendar. It provides me with daily thoughts to take my mind off the major catastrophes of my life (hey - if you had a dog pee on your bathmat right when you got out of the shower - you'd think it was a major catastrophe too).

Well, I do have another desk item - it's not so much a calendar, but it's a little flip book called "Nasty Notes" that I display to everyone in the office. This little book conveys my true thoughts and emotions much more accurately than my don't sweat calendar.

A few of the ones most commonly displayed are:

• Ahhh. I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again. - This is why we have the Touchdown Duck.
  
• Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot. - Truer words have never been spoken.
  
• Sarcasm: just one more service we offer. - The only problem with using sarcasm in our office is that some of the misfits don't get it.
  
• Does your train of thought have a caboose? - I seriously sat in a meeting with one of our misfits and even after 30 minutes - I had no idea what he was saying.
  
• Don't annoy the crazy person. - I am the crazy person.
• And your crybaby whiny ass opinion would be? - Whine, whine, whine - it's not the island of misfit of toys unless someone is complaining about something (mostly about another misfit).
  

On any given today, I'm usually somewhere in the middle of the DSTSS Calendar and Nasty Notes flip book. Today, I'm feeling more, "It is impossible for any of us to be positive all the time. After all, we are human and we are thinking machines." than "No problem is so large or so difficult that it can't be blamed on someone else." Of course, this positive attitude may have more to do with me going to bed at 8:30 last night than the absence of misfit trouble.